Prologue

This chapter has been edited, please let me know what you think!

Prologue

“In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.”

Genesis 1.1

WITH HIS MAJESTIC WHITE wings folded behind his back, he walked, almost stomping the colorless floor under his feet. His gaze was fixated on the giant gates in the distance. Behind him, she looped her arm around his, using her strength to halt his advance towards the golden gates.

“Stop this!” She cried, tightening her grip over his immortal skin. His angelic form was pale, mixing in with the brightness of heaven. It was obvious she cared for him, longed for him to reconsider his decision. But how could he? He did not want to be a servant, he wanted to be served.

Here, there was no day or night, just the constant shine that loomed over heaven.

With a fearsome scowl, he turned to her; golden blonde locks whipped around his face, brushing his forehead. Thoughts of Lucifer’s actions swirled in Lana’s mind, making her question what she should do. She wanted to step in front of him, but panic stopped her. His once soft, gleaming blue eyes had gone cold, resonating with an intense anger.

He grunted. “Why should they worship him? I will show them the truth of things,” he stated, jerking his arm back.

Startled by his reaction, she took a step back. Her silver-black tresses fell across her face, as sobs choked in her throat. She didn’t know if he realized his actions: defying their Lord, their Creator.

“He is our Creator, our…”

“Lana, enough,” he snapped, standing before her; his tone was laced with venom. As he continued to stare at the gates, he was standing with his back to her.

“Lucifer…please,” Lana pleaded again. Her protest cries for him to halt his advances rang in his ear – but he would not stop. Why should I stop? he thought, why should these human beings stay naive to the world they were brought into, not knowing of right and wrong such as our kind does.

He stepped forward, quickening his pace to the pearl-yellow iron that was near his grasp. Lana followed behind him, trying to keep in her cries. She did not understand his thinking process. Humans were recently created; the seventh day had passed, and all were resting.

He then stiffened in his movements, clenching his knuckles until they turned white. He whipped around, looking into the eyes of his beloved.

“Come with me, Lana.” He reached out his hand to her. His ocean eyes locked onto her gaze, wanting to bring her to his side. His defiance, his longing to be recognized by these newly created creatures was starting to consume him even more. To him – it wasn’t just about being noticed – it was power. A power that he too wanted to feel, he craved it, to test these new creatures called “man”.

Lana lowered her gaze, staring intensely at his palm reaching out for her grasp. He stood before her in all his glory, one of God’s most beautiful creatures, even more beautiful than herself. His body was lean, muscular. When she looked upon his face, she saw his soft, yet manly features: his perfect circular face, chiseled jaw and high cheek bones. In their domain, his status was high above hers, and still she didn’t comprehend this need of his. Why must he do this? If I do not stop him… does he not see the folly of his ways?’

He waited a few seconds before agitation started to show across his face. With his hand still held out to her, he furrowed his brows, taking a closer step. No, I will not do this, Lana thought, maneuvering away from him. She shook her head, trying to hold back the tears threatening to stream from her eyes.

A low growl erupted from his throat, as he spread his enormous wings like a bird preparing for flight. “Come with me,” he said harshly, in a dark tone. Fear overtook her. Lana kept staring into the eyes of her lover, unsure of who, or what he was becoming.

“No.” Her words were firm, as her expression started to twist in pain.

“So be it, but this isn’t the end, Lana. I will come for you.” Lucifer locked his gaze onto her hazel irises – one last time – before spinning around and walking towards the gates.

“Lucifer,” she called to him, mustering energy into her voice.

He ignored her calls, walking through the gates and diving towards the earth. Lana collapsed to her knees, letting her tears finally flow. Lucifer, what have you done?

As he made his descent towards the earth – passing through the empty darkness of space and stars – he saw the brown, nearly lifeless planet. The only sign of life came from the sea of green, and two forms caught his sight – a human man and woman.

After that day, Lucifer never returned, but he didn’t forget about the one he left behind. 

Authors Note: Well, I hoped you all enjoyed the prologue and are looking forward to chapter one. This was just supposed to give you a little bit of background about the main characters. There’s a lot more to come, and we will be meeting various angels in the chapters.

PLEASE COMMENT IF YOU LIKED IT!!

Click here for part 1

35 Comments

35 thoughts on “Prologue

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  4. Hi,

    I looked over your website and decided to give you some feedback on the prologue. It is an interesting start to the story, though I am not a fan of prologues.

    “Her protest cries” sounds a little weird. Maybe try – “Her cries of protest…”

    “he saw the brown, nearly lifeless plant.”
    ‘the’ plant? Is the plant important? If not, I would change ‘the’ to ‘a’.

    I truly wonder how this story will unfold.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for checking out my story and website. This s only the first draft, so it’s going to still need some editing. And thanks for pointing out my errors, it’s planet, actually. I made the change and yes, it is important. I do know it still needs some editing, but any feedback you provide will be most helpful 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • You’re very welcome. I will try my best to give more feedback. Also, one of my reasons for not liking prologues is that most publishing houses don’t like books with prologues. They like to jump into the story line right away.

        Ah, a planet. I did not guess that.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ah, I have read that publishing houses don’t like prologues. Since this is only the first draft, I’m still deciding what to keep in the story and what to remove. I haven’t decided if I’m going to pursue publication with this story. I have many readers who enjoy it, however, I don’t know how well the story would do in the “real” world.

        Liked by 1 person

      • That’s great! I admire writers like you that pursue your dreams and publish. I want to publish one day, but I doubt that I will. I don’t think my writing is good enough to publish a book. Also, I don’t think readers like my stories. Sigh…

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you.

        Don’t think that your writing is not good enough. You have like a ton of followers and I bet at least 20-50% would buy your book or download it for your kindle.

        We all have our styles of writing and for those styles, readers. As people always say- the world needs your novel. You put a lot into your character and to see them in print would make you happy, the author, and I think in a way that can be enough for the start so don’t give up on the dream of seeing your novels in print!

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you for the encouragement. On Wattpad I have a lot of followers, but I don’t know if they would buy the books. It would be a dream come true to see my characters names in print though^^ Did you self-publish your book?

        Like

      • You’re very welcome.

        That’s awesome. I don’t have an account on Wattpad, would be too much for me. I’m trying to keep up with my website, my blog, twitter, and started with pininterest.

        Yap, a nice dream!

        I ended up self-publishing with Amazon. They make it easy and have a ton of templates to save your novel so it would print all right. One of the reasons, I went that route was because I researched hundreds of publishing houses and it was hard to tell which ones to trust. In the end I ended up trusting myself more. I figure that option is never out of the question for my future novels.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I know what you mean. It’s so hard keeping up with all the social media sites and story writing sites.

        It’s a dream I hope comes true one day =)

        Maybe I should look into self-publishing with Amazon. Of course, that is after getting beta-readers, an editor and finalizing my manuscript. Yes, it is hard to know what route to take. In the end, business is business, and companies will only do what they feel is best for them.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I do read a lot of books about writing and publishing. I have taken some editing classes, but I do need to practice more. It’s tough fitting everything in. Between a day job, writing, promoting and taking writing classes, I don’t have much time.

        Like

      • You are reading Clash of Tides? Oh, that story is very popular for some reason, and I don’t know why. Probably because it has mermen and mermaids in it. Ugh, all my stories need a good editing. Thanks for reading them though 🙂 I really appreciate it.

        Like

      • Oh, I’m still putting all the links in but chapter 4 is on my website. If you go to my homepage and hover your mouse over Clash of Tides, all the chapters published here are listed. It goes up to Chapter 17 part 1.

        Like

      • Whoa! How many chapters have you read already? I’m sure there is a lot of errors I need to fix when I do the rewrite and editing. Is the story sinking you in? 🙂

        Like

      • Thanks! And yes, I did receive that feedback in the past. Once I do the first rewrite, I’m going to cut down the paragraphs. Thanks for reading!!

        Like

      • Chapter 7 Notes:

        “What was that creature? What are you hiding from me? How can I breathe underwater? How were you communicating with me?! I demand an answer from him, raising my voice. For once, I don’t back down, but he is before me, unfazed by my questions.
        -You’re missing ” to close the speech

        His face is stoic. “Is that it, or do you have any more questions?” He growls out through clenched.
        -clenched what? jaw?

        There was no comment box for chapter 7

        Liked by 1 person

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